Nervous/anxious 8 year old
| Nervous/anxious 8 year old           |
30/06/2009 09:19 - Ask Mother Hen (Locality: Wicklow)
I have a little boy who is nearly 8. Doing well in school but just got his report and am baffled by "how to help with" the areas the teacher spotted difficulties in. She describes him as "unecessarily nerous which as a result can hinder his concentration" and also he is willing and enthusiastic but "he can find it difficult to complete work". He spend a while settling in to new room/teacher/1st class and kept forgetting his right homework books, not writing down homework correctly. By the end of year with me on his case a lot he got a good bit better.
So cutting a long story short - how can i build up his confidence, help him not be overly nervous etc....
| re : Nervous/anxious 8 year old           |
09/07/2009 10:16 - Ask Mother Hen
The poor little guy! He really needs a boost to his confidence to help him. The first thing I think you should really concentrate on is positive affirmation. Notice each time he does something good and tell him how well he has done and that you are proud of him and so on. Don´t go over the top but try to give him praise and encouragement as often as you can. Be specific - notice specific elements of what he has done and that will show him that you are not giving ´sugary´ praise but have noticed what he has done in detail. For example, if he cleans up his room comments such as ´I[I] see you put your shoes away and hung up all you clothes, well done. I like the way you have tidied up your shelves and arranged your books[/I]" etc.
Try to chat to him as much as possible. Spend time with him and really build a connection. That way, you will be able to talk through his worries when they arise as the trust and confidence you have built with him will allow this. When he goes back to school, it may be worth helping him to organise himself a bit more. Don´t make the mistake of taking over the job for him - instead, encourage and help him with a ´I know you can do it´ attitude. As he sees that he is capable of doing these things his confidence will grow.
I hope this helps