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re : bAD eXAMPLE?           reply
01/10/2013 07:05 - Ask Mother Hen
I notice the first way you describe your son is that he is happy, in fact you repeat it later and also says, he likes his own company and that he is in a couple of clubs. Starting secondary school is the beginning of a new phase that is both exciting and a bit intimidating. It sounds like you and he spend a lot of time together and he is happy with that.
When a parent makes time for a child and spends time with the child, the impact on the child is that they feel secure and valued. Time without the television might be an idea, to sit and chat, a drive in the car, a swim in a pool or a short trip somewhere, in fact side to side communication in the car is what teenagers love and its less direct and more informal. Your son sounds fine , but always talk with teenagers and be involved in their world, ´how are things in school´ and make yourself available if he is interested in a chat.
Your husband is talking about himself, everything a person says is about themselves. Would he like friends? You say he is stressed, exercise whether a walk or joining a gym reduces stress and literally washes stress out of the system.
Enjoy your teen while he still wants to spend time with you and relax!

bAD eXAMPLE?           reply
23/09/2013 10:28 - Ask Mother Hen (Locality: Westmeath)
1 child, boy 12(happy)started secondary,husband is gets stressed as son has no - friends-husband is quiet keeps to himself , poters around the garden. I do most things with son.Son has couple hobbies,no real friends.I was very outgoing (in 40s now) i am i PJs at 7 each evening watch soaps 4 evening with son.Husband thinks i should not be doing this each evening @son needs friends his own age to aid his development and find his place in the world.I agree somewhat , sure son is happy?whats problem?I havent really found any friends still looking (moved house 6 yrs ago)cant find anyone on my level. I meet people(elderly tho!) around town to chat..Husband trying to improve his own unhappiness gone to counselling ..seems to be helping him ,joining classes etc..Appreciate other views ..what harm (if any) am i doing? son in couple clubs ..likes his own company it him having no friends outside school such a big issue that husband seems to think it is..

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