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Child wants to return to old school

Child wants to return to old school           reply
25/02/2010 14:44 - Ask Mother Hen
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My 7 year old daughter says she wants to go back to her old school. She was there for junior infants and has been at the new one for nearly two years since. She struggled to settle from the start with the move, she is bright and demanding but unmotivated and she says it´s "not hard enough", or it´s boring, she hates the teacher etc. To me her teacher seems lovely and all the other kids like her. She never complained about her old school, which seemed to have a different approach to teaching, perhaps just because it was far smaller and more flexible. It also had a higher academic standard as far as I can tell.
The reason we moved was largely a distance issue but I could, with some difficulty, drive her back to the old school each day. However all her friendships would be disrupted, we´d need new afterschool classes, it seems like a drastic move. She has made several very nice friends that I hope she´ll have in secondary school as well.
I have said she has to stay where she is, that school is school, but naturally I want her school experience to be positive.
The new school recognises her difficulties but can´t help a lot, says she is of high ability and clearly under-stretched but they have to cater for lowest common denominator.
Am I over-analysing? Are friendships so flexible at this age that it doesn´t matter? Any views welcome.



re : Child wants to return to old school           reply
26/02/2010 10:42 - Ask Mother Hen
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It sounds to me like your daughter is simply having a settling in period. My understanding from your post is that she was only 1 year at the old school - that is not a very long time and given that it was only junior infants it is hard to judge how academically challenging that can be. I think you daughter is just panicing about the move. She may be seeing that she has 7 more years in this school and that is very daunting. I think the best way for you to help her settle is to break it down into smaller timeframes. What if you say to her that you have spoken to her old school and they said that they wouldn´t take her back mid year and to contact them in the summer. Tell her that you can switch then if there is a place. By giving her this plan, she can ´allow´ herself to be happy at the new school.
I think that if she thinks that she only has a few more months, she may take the focus off thinking about going back to her old school and get on with the new school in a happier frame of mind. I think that by the summer, if she seems to have settled, you can say that they don´t have a place in the old school yet but she is on a waiting list. As time goes on ,I think that this will not be an issue as she will settle fine in the new school.




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